Our Hotwives

Bullbe wrote: ↑

Mon Feb 17, 2025 6:43 am

Hey everyone, .......

But despite the arousal, I feel trapped between two opposing forces. On one hand, this fantasy excites me like nothing else. On the other, I can’t shake the feeling that it’s parasitic and destructive—something that will erode what we have rather than enhance it. I fear that even if we continue loving each other, this will eventually change our relationship forever in ways I can’t predict or undo. .......


But now, as this desire becomes more defined, I feel disgusted with myself. I feel depressed, ashamed, and desperate to find a way to stop. ......

Would love to hear your thoughts.

athlete915 wrote: ↑

Sun Feb 23, 2025 7:59 am

First, welcome OHW!

Not to minimize your angst, but I would suggest that your conflicted feelings are normal. I don’t think I’ve ever met a cuck, whether they were a wannabe or experienced, who didn’t experience similar feelings at some point. At a minimum, the desire significantly deviates from societal norms, which will cause some issues and doubts.

So, you’re not alone. These feelings are to be expected. I would frankly be surprised to meet someone who didn’t have them.

I won’t wade in on the “broken” factors you mentioned now, but I will give you a different perspective. In my experience, my cuckolds only developed their cuckold desires once they were with their wives or at least in another very serious relationship. That has always suggested a deeper meaning to me. Their desires are based on wanting the women they love and adore to have as much pleasure as possible, even if that takes involving another partner. That’s different than other common sexual fantasies, like, say, wanting an FMF threesome. I think it helps to explain why this fantasy becomes so much more intense than those previous fantasies (As you said, it excites you like nothing else).

So, rather reflecting something wrong or broken about the husbands, I think it reveals how much they love their wives.

In your case, it is apparent that you love your wife too. The way you talk about her and your marriage is very endearing. Correct me if I am wrong, but I would guess that your fantasies don’t revolve around the simple act of her being with just any other guy but are instead about her having the best, most pleasurable sex possible. You want something special for her.

Sound about right?

Don’t worry about the whole humiliation thing. Sadly, too often, people group together multiple kinks, and that can scare people off. Overly prescriptive labels usually hurt rather than help. While there may be some common themes, every person and couple is different and should be treated as such. I never assume that just because one of my cucks or couples liked something, the next one will. Just because some cucks like humiliation doesn’t mean they all will.

The starting point is your desire to share your wife, but from there, the best approach would be to ask what excites you.

Regarding practical advice, I recommend that you two slowly explore things, with the total understanding that you two can stop at any time. You said that sharing the fantasy with her has improved your sex life. That’s a great start. You can then slowly work up from there by, for instance, introducing a dildo into your play or going out to a bar and encouraging her to flirt and dance with other men (you said you loved watching her flirt). And that could be it. If you don’t want to progress beyond that, don’t. If, on the other hand, you two decide you want to explore more, you can look at some next steps. Nothing is irreversible. Nothing commits you to go further than you want.

Anyway, I hope that helps a little. I am happy to discuss things further and offer more tailored advice. Best of luck, and don’t doubt you’re a fantastic husband.

MartasBoy wrote: ↑

Sun Feb 23, 2025 9:22 am

Bullbe wrote: ↑

Mon Feb 17, 2025 6:43 am

Hey everyone, .......

But despite the arousal, I feel trapped between two opposing forces. On one hand, this fantasy excites me like nothing else. On the other, I can’t shake the feeling that it’s parasitic and destructive—something that will erode what we have rather than enhance it. I fear that even if we continue loving each other, this will eventually change our relationship forever in ways I can’t predict or undo. .......


But now, as this desire becomes more defined, I feel disgusted with myself. I feel depressed, ashamed, and desperate to find a way to stop. ......

Would love to hear your thoughts.

I think that your fears are valid, but not your shame. I believe, that for many of us who have these fantasies, it is about that natural desire to feel some validation of our attraction to our woman. We all have felt that excitement of validation, when we first introduced a new girlfriend to our buddies and they make a fuss over her, and tell us how lucky we are, and how wonderful she is.

Many of us naturally get a little thrill when we walk into a public place, and catch other men, and maybe even women, admiring the woman we are with. It is exciting to realize, that those other people admire her beauty, and would want to be with her. A hot wife fantasy is just an extension of that, I believe. It is that extreme end of the fantasy, thinking about other people Desiring her, and actually seeing it happen.

You don't have to actually act on the fantasy. You can keep it at a fantasy level and share it with your wife.

While in bed together, and touching each other, you can ask her to tell her about an imaginary lover she might have. Ask her to tell you what he would look like, and what they would do together.

Share your celebrity crushes with one another. And ask her what her fantasy date would be with her celebrity crush. Have her pick out men in public that she finds attractive.

...She was open-minded and receptive, and while she doesn’t have a personal need to explore it, she genuinely enjoys the dirty talk...

...something that will erode what we have rather than enhance it.

She’s my best friend, my greatest passion, and the thought of jeopardizing what we have terrifies me.

One thing I should mention is that I’m not really into the humiliation aspect that some people associate with cuckolding. My fantasy is almost always MFM, with me being an active participant—not excluded, not degraded, just there, fully involved.

In many ways, it feels like a natural extension of my attraction to her and the way I’ve always been turned on by her being flirty with other men.

...I’ve been diving into research on this, and I believe this fantasy is a manifestation of deeper psychological factors, possibly past trauma or attachment dynamics. Studies suggest that some men eroticize feelings of submission, competition, or inadequacy as a way to process unresolved emotions. Others may have grown up with unstable attachments or experiences that shaped how they view intimacy and validation. This isn’t to say that every person with these fantasies is "broken," but I suspect in my case, it’s tied to something deeper...

But now, as this desire becomes more defined, I feel disgusted with myself. I feel depressed, ashamed, and desperate to find a way to stop.

But the more I try to push it away, the more it lingers...

I fear that even if we continue loving each other, this will eventually change our relationship forever in ways I can’t predict or undo.

MartasBoy wrote: ↑

Sun Feb 23, 2025 9:22 am

Bullbe wrote: ↑

Mon Feb 17, 2025 6:43 am

Hey everyone, .......

But despite the arousal, I feel trapped between two opposing forces. On one hand, this fantasy excites me like nothing else. On the other, I can’t shake the feeling that it’s parasitic and destructive—something that will erode what we have rather than enhance it. I fear that even if we continue loving each other, this will eventually change our relationship forever in ways I can’t predict or undo. .......


But now, as this desire becomes more defined, I feel disgusted with myself. I feel depressed, ashamed, and desperate to find a way to stop. ......

Would love to hear your thoughts.

I think that your fears are valid, but not your shame. I believe, that for many of us who have these fantasies, it is about that natural desire to feel some validation of our attraction to our woman. We all have felt that excitement of validation, when we first introduced a new girlfriend to our buddies and they make a fuss over her, and tell us how lucky we are, and how wonderful she is.

Many of us naturally get a little thrill when we walk into a public place, and catch other men, and maybe even women, admiring the woman we are with. It is exciting to realize, that those other people admire her beauty, and would want to be with her. A hot wife fantasy is just an extension of that, I believe. It is that extreme end of the fantasy, thinking about other people Desiring her, and actually seeing it happen.

You don't have to actually act on the fantasy. You can keep it at a fantasy level and share it with your wife.

While in bed together, and touching each other, you can ask her to tell her about an imaginary lover she might have. Ask her to tell you what he would look like, and what they would do together.

Share your celebrity crushes with one another. And ask her what her fantasy date would be with her celebrity crush. Have her pick out men in public that she finds attractive.

Bullbe wrote: ↑

Mon Feb 17, 2025 6:43 am

Hey everyone,

I wanted to share my journey with this fantasy, my excitement, my struggles, and the deep internal conflict I’ve been facing. I’ve been wrestling with this for years, and I hope that by opening up, I might gain some insight from those who have walked this path.

I first shared my cuckold/hotwife fantasies with my wife about two and a half years ago. She was open-minded and receptive, and while she doesn’t have a personal need to explore it, she genuinely enjoys the dirty talk. In fact, her body really responds to it, and it’s only intensified our already incredible sex life. We’ve always had an amazing connection—physically and emotionally—and this has only made our intimacy more intense in some ways.

But despite the arousal, I feel trapped between two opposing forces. On one hand, this fantasy excites me like nothing else. On the other, I can’t shake the feeling that it’s parasitic and destructive—something that will erode what we have rather than enhance it. I fear that even if we continue loving each other, this will eventually change our relationship forever in ways I can’t predict or undo.

For context, we’re both in our 40s and have been together since college—24 years. I’m 6 feet tall, a former athlete with a strong build, and well above average in size. My wife is 5’4, with a gorgeous slim body, large breasts, and a stunning face. Beyond that, she has this intoxicating, magnetic personality that makes people naturally drawn to her. She’s my best friend, my greatest passion, and the thought of jeopardizing what we have terrifies me.

One thing I should mention is that I’m not really into the humiliation aspect that some people associate with cuckolding. My fantasy is almost always MFM, with me being an active participant—not excluded, not degraded, just there, fully involved. In many ways, it feels like a natural extension of my attraction to her and the way I’ve always been turned on by her being flirty with other men. Looking back, I realize this arousal has been with me for a long time, even before I fully understood what it meant.

But now, as this desire becomes more defined, I feel disgusted with myself. I feel depressed, ashamed, and desperate to find a way to stop.

More than anything, I am afraid of what this would mean for my family. I don’t want to lose what we have, I don’t want to hurt my wife, and I don’t want to risk something that has been the foundation of my life for over two decades. But the more I try to push it away, the more it lingers.

I’ve been diving into research on this, and I believe this fantasy is a manifestation of deeper psychological factors, possibly past trauma or attachment dynamics. Studies suggest that some men eroticize feelings of submission, competition, or inadequacy as a way to process unresolved emotions. Others may have grown up with unstable attachments or experiences that shaped how they view intimacy and validation. This isn’t to say that every person with these fantasies is "broken," but I suspect in my case, it’s tied to something deeper.

So that’s where I am - thrilled and aroused, but also deeply uneasy, ashamed, and afraid. I wanted to share with people who understand because I feel like I’m at a crossroads. Has anyone else felt this way? How did you navigate it?

Would love to hear your thoughts.

Smudger wrote: ↑

Fri Mar 21, 2025 11:37 am

Have to agree the celebrity crush is a great ice breaker. Then role play. The wife is a fan of Idris elba- and had some fantastic nights with him 🫢

arkansascuck wrote: ↑

Sat Mar 22, 2025 4:48 pm

i notice in reading the stories, i notice a common theme in some of them...there is some distrust already brewing in some of the husbands, suspecting that something may already be going on with your wife and another man, or something she has done or said that makes you doubt her faithfulness to you.

just some food for thought.